Divorce Mediation in Toronto, ON

Separating is one of the hardest things a family goes through, and the decisions that come with it can feel heavy when you're already tired and hurting. Divorce mediation in Toronto gives you and your former partner a calmer place to work through those decisions, one at a time, with someone steady in the room. At Dr. Karen Kaffko & Associates, we see it this way: family mediation reduces conflict, which allows for an easier adjustment for you and your children. Dr. Karen Kaffko is a registered psychologist who leads our collaborative psychotherapy practice, and she is also a certified Family Mediator. So when you work with a divorce mediator in Toronto on our team, you're working with someone who understands the feelings in the room as well as the agreement you're working toward. We meet with couples both before and after separation, at our office at 327 Eglinton Ave. East, on the main floor.

Divorce and Family Mediation at Dr. Karen Kaffko & Associates

Our separation and divorce work is made up of several services, so you can start with the one that fits where your family is right now. Dr. Kaffko & Associates offers Collaborative Family Mediation, Separation and Co-Parenting Agreements, Divorce Coaching, Parenting Coordination, Parenting Plans and Parenting Plan Assessments, and they sit alongside the rest of our therapy services for individuals, couples and families. Family mediation in Toronto with our team can be one part of that support or the whole of it, depending on what you need.

Splitting up can cause real emotional upheaval, and many couples come to mediation both before and after they separate. While you're grieving the hopes and dreams you had for your marriage, you're also being asked to make important decisions about your children's lives and your own.

We help you reach agreements that focus on the needs of your children and the best interests of the family, through understanding, open communication and working out the conflicts that are already there. It's slower, more careful work in the early days, and that care is what helps the agreement hold up later.

In the Toronto area, 21,505 couple families in 2021 were same-gender, transgender or non-binary couples. We are an LGBTQ+ affirming practice, and every couple who comes to us for mediation is welcome here.

Separation agreement mediation is where a lot of this work comes together. With a mediator's help, the two of you can work out a separation agreement, a co-parenting agreement, and a residency and parenting plan that sets out where the children live and how the weeks are shared. These are the big decisions about the lives of your children and both of you after the split, and they're easier to make when someone neutral is helping the conversation along.

You'll probably meet some newer words in your agreement. Ontario now talks about decision-making responsibility, which is the right to make significant decisions about a child's health, education, religion and other important matters, and parenting time, which is the time the children spend with each of you. Shared parenting time, for child support, means a child lives with each parent at least 40% of the time. An informal parenting plan can be hard to enforce, so your parenting plan can be written right into your separation agreement, where both of you can come back to it.

Just over half of Toronto couples, 53.9%, had children in 2021, and the city was home to 152,635 one-parent families. For a great many parents across the city, the hardest part of separating is thinking about how the kids will handle a school night in a new home, or the drive back and forth between two.

We believe laying the foundation for future problem solving keeps the focus on the children. An agreement built that way gives you a way to handle the next change, whether that's a new school, a summer schedule or a move, without having to start over each time.

Helping children adjust to separation and a new family structure is part of our work with separating families. Children often take in more than adults realize, even when no one has sat them down to explain what's happening, and a calmer process between their parents gives them less to carry.

Co-parenting mediation in Toronto with Dr. Kaffko draws on her experience with couple and family conflict, and with the way separation and divorce affect both children and adults. She can work with parents to develop a collaborative co-parenting plan that meets the needs of the children, one that both of you can work from as the years go on.

Everything starts with a free consultation. It's a chance to tell us what's going on, ask whatever's on your mind and get a sense of whether we're a good fit for your family.

If you haven't separated yet, Sherry Barrett can meet with you on your own or as a couple first. She helps you prepare for the difficult decisions ahead and for the mediation process itself, so you come in feeling ready and able to negotiate with a clear head.

Family mediation in Ontario follows a familiar order from there. The mediator meets with each of you separately for intake and screening, which makes sure you're both in an equal position to negotiate. Next comes an agreement to mediate, which you both sign, and it sets out which issues you'll work on, whether the mediation is open or closed, and the schedule. You each share your financial information so the process is fair. Then the joint sessions begin, and the mediator writes down what the two of you have agreed to.

The sessions work toward your separation and co-parenting agreements. After that, post-divorce counselling is there to help you adjust to life afterwards, at whatever pace feels right for you. Appointments are offered at flexible daytime, evening and weekend hours, 7 days a week, which makes it a little easier when you're juggling work, kids and two households.

Mediation works when you're both willing to try to work out a solution, you both feel safe meeting to talk about the issues, and each of you can say what you need and listen to the other person's concerns. Court may be the better option where there is family violence or a significant power imbalance, and in those situations mediation may not be appropriate.

The biggest difference between mediation and court in an Ontario divorce is who decides. In mediation, the two of you shape the outcome yourselves, and in court a judge makes those calls. Mediation is also closed unless you both agree otherwise, so it stays private and confidential, with a few limited exceptions such as concerns about a child's safety. A process like mediation is generally faster and less expensive than court, and the Divorce Act has asked couples who are divorcing to try one since March 1, 2021, wherever that's appropriate.

If you're still deciding, our Separation Counselling for the couple deciding to stay or let go, and our Divorce Coaching, can be a good next step before mediation.

You'll still want your own lawyer for divorce mediation, and the two fit together well. A mediator stays neutral and doesn't take sides, make decisions or give legal advice. Each of you should get independent legal advice before and throughout mediation, and advice from different lawyers before you sign, so the agreement is legally binding. Your lawyer doesn't have to come to the sessions with you, though they can be involved.

Every legal adviser on a divorce case has a duty under the Divorce Act to encourage their client to try a family dispute resolution process, unless it would clearly not be appropriate. We help the two of you reach the agreement, and your lawyers make sure you each understand your rights before you sign it.

In Ontario, family mediators can be social workers, lawyers, psychologists or other professionals. Our mediators are a registered psychologist and registered social workers who also work as therapists with couples and families, and they bring that experience into every mediation session. You can read the full profiles of our psychologist and social workers to learn more about each of them.

Dr. Karen Kaffko is a registered psychologist with the College of Psychologists and Behaviour Analysts of Ontario, the supervising psychologist of the clinic and a certified family mediator in Toronto. She holds a Master's in Social Work as well as a Master's and a Doctorate in Psychology. She taught at York University for several years, where she helped develop and teach courses including Family Mediation and Family Therapy.

Louise Bailey, M.S.W., R.S.W., has been in practice for more than 30 years. She was instrumental in establishing one of the first comprehensive programs for families dealing with the process and aftermath of separation and divorce. She has mediated high-conflict couples, helping them write separation agreements and work through residency and co-parent planning, and Alternative Dispute Resolution is part of her approach.

Sherry Barrett, M.S.W., R.S.W., has spent more than 15 years helping individuals, couples and families through life's transitions. She offers Family Mediation using an Attachment and Solution Focused approach, helps separating families prepare co-parenting plans, and offers Post Divorce Counselling.

Separation touches every part of family life, and one team can stay with you through all of it. Separation Counselling is there for the couple deciding to stay or let go. Divorce Coaching and Parenting Coordination are part of our separation support too, so the help you get doesn't have to end on the day an agreement is signed. Post Divorce Counselling helps with adjusting to life afterwards, including managing more time away from your children, dating, co-parenting and introducing new partners.

Some couples use couples counselling as a way toward closure and separation, with co-parenting part of that work. For the changes that happen at home, our family therapy for separation, remarriage and parent-child relationships helps children and parents settle into a new family structure, including blended families.

Every family's separation is its own, and the easiest way to talk through yours is a first conversation with our team. When you're ready, you can Schedule Your Free Consultation and tell us a little about where things stand. Our office is at 327 Eglinton Ave. East, main floor, in Toronto, and we keep flexible daytime, evening and weekend hours, 7 days a week. You can refer yourself, or a professional you're working with can make the referral for you.